The Rules Of Bein' A Pimp Mama

1. Walk in as if you own the room.

2. Check music

3. If good dance right away

4. If shitty go to bar get drink

5. Hit dance floor again

6. Bounce off wall

7. If someone approaches to dance - go with what you feel

8. Dance hard

9. When he starts gettin' too close- walk away

10.When he comes back for more

11. Dance and tell him you have a boyfriend.

12. When he asks where said boyfriend is - tell him he's at home 'cause he trusts you.

13. When he presses cause he doesn't believe - you tell him your boyfriend is married

14. Twist the knife that'll kill him - cause he probably is too.

15. Work it.

16. When he insists on walkin' you out
bring him to your
conveniently close car
under the street light
across from the club entrance -
where EVERYONE can see

17. Get in

18. When he asks for your number -
tell him you never give it out
but you'll take his

19. When he gives you three - with instructions - smile and say goodnight

20. Forget it and be glad for the workout

21. Go home and think about your lover.